We are one full week in, and I cannot believe how far we have come! Lainey is absolutely crushing it and yet this is the hardest thing I have had to teach her. The mental preparation, the clearing of calendars, the mental taxation of "Am I doing this right?", "Is she getting it?", the constant planning and preparation of moving between rooms and outside, and finding the balance of prompting, but not over-prompting and hovering! The list could go on! Even though this has been the hardest thing to teach yet, it has no doubt been the most rewarding!!
I knew I wanted to potty train Lainey early (I was trained at 18 months) and the anticipation and excitement around Baby Girl's arrival in November was extra motivation. I knew Lainey was very capable and also training now totally made more sense for our family than training later. Do it now while I "have the time" vs in November when I have a newborn and a toddler. Training now gives us 4-5 months practice before Baby Girl - plenty of time to perfect Lainey's new skill!
This isn't a how-to post. I am purely writing it so that I can remember how/what we did and to track Lainey's progress. I will definitely be referring to this when we potty train again in the future.
How I Did It - The Prep Before Day 1
Lainey started going to the bathroom with me since she was about 17 months old. I taught her the sign for "potty" at that age as well. When I would go to the bathroom, I would tell her I'm going potty and would sign it. She'd come in with me and sometimes try. She learned to wipe, flush, and wash her hands but she wasn't really going on the potty - which was fine because I wasn't actually trying, more so getting her interested. We did have some success though, only at bath time. We noticed Lainey would pee in the tub as we were starting the water so there were some instances where she could finish on the potty! It was awesome!
Before officially starting, I purchased and speed-read "Oh Crap! Potty Training" by Jamie Glowacki. We decided on our start date (June 30th) , cleared our plans for a few weeks, and started getting mentally prepared. I think the timing worked great because we were approaching the July 4th holiday weekend. We didn't have many plans and were planning on being home. Plus, Tyler got off an extra day over the holiday weekend so that was an added bonus!
About 5 days before our start date, I told Lainey that in a few days, we were going to say bye-bye to her diapers. She was going to go pee and poop on the potty - like Mom and Dad! I told her all about this, very excitedly, and she sensed my excitement and would repeat it and sign "potty" back to me. Each day leading up to it, I told her the same thing.
We bought an extra potty (so we had 2 "Summer" brand potties) and I put some books and a few toys in a bin next to the potty in our bathroom. The other potty I planned to carry around with us the entire day. (FYI - the books and toys were only used for a couple days, as an aid for helping Lainey sit longer on the potty. She certainly does not need them anymore. She knows exactly what to do when she sits on the potty now).
I read and planned to use the guide that the book provided. The first three "blocks" are:
Block 1 - pant-less and diaper-less
Block 2 - dressed, but commando
Block 3 - dressed with underwear
As the book states, "Do or do not. Do not try." That was the mentality I kept potty training. We were not just going to "try" it and when it became inconvenient, stop or say that "she's just not ready". This was it. We were all in. The book was a fantastic guide and resource too! Very encouraging and honest! I am really happy I went this route with potty training.
Day 1 - Pant-Less & Diaper-Less (Block 1)
When I got Lainey up for the morning, I reminded her what we were doing that day - we were saying bye-bye to her diapers and we were going to go pee and poop on the potty like Mom and Dad. She was excited!
Together we said goodbye to her diapers (we put them in the "garbage"), I got her out of her PJs and sleep sack, put on a t-shirt, and removed her diaper! Here we go!
I tried to keep Lainey confined to one room at a time, which was difficult with her active personality. I kept looking for a subtle signal or her signing or telling me "potty". Very early, I learned what Lainey's non-verbal signal of "I have to go" was and I started prompting her, "Lainey, it looks like you have to go potty. Let me help you try.", and then I'd guide her to the potty to sit. Lainey resisted going. She was acting camel-like.
We continued to play all over the house and outside. I brought the potty everywhere, which Lainey definitely noticed - should have been a warning sign of what was coming but #newbie. Lainey continued to drink and give her non-verbal signal that she had to go. I would guide her to the potty, but with no luck. I decided I was going to stop guiding and let the first pee just happen!
Finally, at 10:45 am (after nearly 2.5 hours of being up and holding it in), she had her first pee of the day!
I didn't expect any more pees before naptime and that's exactly what happened.
For naptime, I kept Lainey's diaper off, just until it was time to lay her down in her crib. I explained to her that she was going to wear a diaper during nap because she was going to be sleeping and she wouldn't be able to tell me if she needed to go potty.
She woke up wet, which I expected.
We continued to play inside and outside, bringing the potty with us wherever we went. We had three other accidents that afternoon but on the last accident, she was making a run for the potty (we just didn't get her seated in time). Even though she didn't make it to the potty, It was very encouraging to see her piece it together! We ended the night with a successful pee on the potty too! Overall, Lainey went 2 - 5 on Day 1. I was really happy with the progress she made!
Days 2-4 - Pant-Less & Diaper-Less (Block 1)
Each day, Lainey seemed to piece together a little more and more. There were a few little accidents every day, but all were a matter of not getting to the potty in time, even though she was running to it. The successes we had were all prompted by me, either at routine times we established (upon waking, before/after eating, before bed, etc.) or by learning her non-verbal signal that she had to go.
Day 2 brought her first poop on the potty! Big day!
On Day 3, Lainey started showing some resistance. First in the form of just holding it in (she literally was camel-like, going only once the whole morning!). Then, in the afternoon, I noticed she would give her non-verbal signal but when I helped her to the potty, she would resist sitting. I referred back to the book and realized I was over-prompting and hovering. So instead of helping her to the potty, I started saying, "Lainey, it looks like you have to go potty. The potty is right here if you need it". I gave her *some* control.
The minute I let that happen and stopped over-prompting and hovering, Lainey immediately got it! She continued running to the potty when she had to but more importantly, when it was time for those routine potty times, she was not fighting it! She was sitting on the potty and successfully peeing! Girl just needed some control!
Day 4, we decided to venture out of the house a little. We decided to take a bike ride around the neighborhood so we loaded up our bike cart with Lainey and her potty and off we went! We had success before and after our bike ride and no accidents while biking. Woohoo!
We also had another poop on the potty which was very exciting!
After the progress and learning Lainey made, I knew we were ready for the next block.
Days 5-8 - Dressed, But Commando (Block 2)
I was little nervous about this block since the book said this can be the hardest block and where most parents call it quits. There could also be regression during this block, and I was expecting some set-backs but Lainey kept learning and building from each day - we had no regressions or set-backs at all!
On Day 5, we went on our first official outing to get ice cream downtown. We were gone for about an hour and there were no accidents while out, or at all on Day 5.
Each day, I continued prompting, but only at the times I consistently and routinely set. During these prompts, Lainey would sit, not fight it, and was usually successful! Or she'd sit and try but tell me "all done" and I respected that she didn't have to go. A very exciting moment occurred on Day 6, when during breakfast, Lainey signed "potty" while seated in her chair. We quickly removed her and sat her on the potty and she went! Later, while in her playroom, she needed to go and went over and stood by her potty. She held her bladder until we helped her sit, and she then successfully peed!
Another very exciting moment happened today, on Day 8. Lainey self-initiated her own poop! I was getting her some snacks in the kitchen, and Tyler was playing with her in the living room. Lainey came up to Tyler and said, "Dada, Dada!" and then signed "potty". He immediately put her on the potty we have in our living room and to his surprise, a poop!! This was the first time Lainey self-initiated a poop! Our minds were blown!
Summary
I really didn't know what to expect going into this! I was very excited but also a little nervous. Wearing a diaper has been something Lainey has experienced since the first few minutes of her life. I knew Lainey was very capable and is a very quick study but how was she going to handle it? How was I going to handle it?
Over this past week, Lainey has just blown me away. I truly believe she understands the concept of potty training. I do not believe you can potty train in 3 days, however. Potty training is definitely a continuous process - you are not just "done" in 3 days. I do believe the general concept can be learned quickly, but there are definitely many weeks/months of practice and new experiences to test with the newly learned skill.
This week, we did not have any catastrophic accidents. No poops on the carpet or accidents in her bike cart, car seat, or while out. All our accidents have been minor (pee) and on the carpet. I know there will be accidents yet (it's bound to still happen) and there will be learning opportunities for us both. There also could be some regression or set-backs in the future too, I really don't know!
We still have to get Lainey to Block 3, which is underwear. I am not in any rush to push this on her fast. The book says underwear easily resembles a diaper and there can also be regression here. I plan on staying in Block 2 for a few weeks yet (I think) to keep developing the muscle memory and practice!
Other things we have to learn yet is how to pull up/down her pants. Lainey is young and honestly, that's not a skill I worked much on before potty training. Today Lainey started to pull her pants up, but she definitely needs assistance, especially with getting them down.
We will also need to nap and bedtime potty train. Right now, I only focused on daytime potty training.
There are other blocks in the book that we will need to work through too. I honestly need to go back and read more about them! So really, this is definitely a long process! I don't think people talk too much about the actual process - all you read about is how toddlers are trained in 3 days. If you ask me, that's not true at all!
Lastly, below are some of the things that worked best for us this past week.
Things that Worked Best for Us:
Reading the book, "Oh Crap, Potty Training"
Prepping Lainey before actually starting - diapers are going bye-bye, etc.
Being mentally prepared. Our theme: "Do or do not do. Do not try." This was it. We weren't going to "try" potty training. We were going to do it. End of story.
Learning to prompt but not over-prompting or hovering
Setting and being consistent with our routine - I would prompt Lainey at all the routine times we established (upon waking, before/after eating, before bed, etc.)
Being prepared - we brought the potty everywhere! In the bike cart, in the car, to get ice cream, to the park - literally EVERYWHERE! Not planning on changing this anytime soon either!
Knowing Lainey's schedule - if Lainey hadn't pooped yet (during her normal time), I wouldn't leave the house for an adventure. Lainey communicated that she had to poop today, but until she consistently does this, I don't feel comfortable leaving the house in the afternoon when I know she hasn't pooped yet.
Being patient and realizing this is a process
Training now vs after Baby Girl's arrival - I can't say what it would have been like, but I do know what I did all this week would be very difficult to do with a newborn in my arms!
What a big week it's been, Lainey girl! I am so incredibly proud of all the progress and learning you made this past week! You never cease to amaze me! Keep it up, sweet girl! I love you more than I could ever put into words!!
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